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HavenForts: Construct JetFists - The Chronicles of Wargasm (Episode 2, NeoForts)
  #1  
Old 01-17-2007
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Default Highly Competitive

Because of the highly competitive environment the staff present I have found myself in a hard place. Either I assert my manliness and produce quality work matching that of Will's, or I quit and cry in the third story bathroom. I am choosing the first one... however! I am going to explain to you the development of something completely unrelated to SourceForts.

What am I going to show you, you ask? Well the building, painting, and use of a Ravens themed ruit table. If you don't know what ruit is, or if you call it beer pong, I will become very angry... so don't do it. First off, we must begin with a concept. However, due to my friends lack of computer know-how the only program he has is Paint. Keep in mind though, it is the magician, not the wand.


Next you must find a piece of wood that is official size! If it's not official size, it ain't acceptable. Once you find this piece of lumber in your basement, you've gatta lay it down in a work space area. After finding some conveniently located sanding tools, sand down the edges. Wouldn't want anyone poking their eyes out!


The next step involves a car, a watch, and a twenty. Drive to your nearest Home Depot, which might just happen to be in the ghetto. Whip out your watch and check to make sure you have less than five minutes before it closes. Approach the paints section only to be completely boggled. Don't fret though, the "helpful" paints "expert" will not try to rip you off. Purchase your gold and black (Super Glossy) paints and leave.

You're going to have to use a roller to put down the first layer of paint. To start, put down a layer of white. You'll probably find a bucket of it lying around in your basements from your last addition. Roll on a second coat and wait for it to dry.


Next lay down your painter's tape. If you for some reason forgot to buy it at Home Depot, just use duct tape... it'll work fine... right? Lay the tape down where the white will be. Consult your design for details. Make sure to measure too! Wouldn't want crooked lines.


Next you're going to need to go over your board with five coats of super glossy black paint. Allow twelve weeks for drying. Once that's done it's time to paint the Raven's symbol on! Lucky for you, since you have the best artistic abilities out of everyone, you're going to be the one, sketching, painting, fixing, and repainting the symbol. Spend about 10 hours working on the raven before declaring it finished.


Lastly, pull up the tape you laid earlier. It may be extremely difficult because you used duct tape... not that I did, but if you did, it might be hard. You should have some solid looking lines once you pull the tape up.


The final finishing step is to find the sweet spot for bounce shots. You've gatta know where to aim to sink it every time. Don't tell anyone though! After that you're done! Good job making that incredible ruit table! Oh and, I'll try and get a real picture of the finished product, no promises though.


Final profuct:

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Last edited by Stieffers; 10-12-2007 at 09:07 PM.
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  #2  
Old 01-17-2007
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Yeah, let's see an actual picture of your beer pong table.
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  #3  
Old 01-17-2007
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I don't like you.
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Old 01-17-2007
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Lies.

(10 characters? blah)
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  #5  
Old 01-17-2007
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wait wait, what is a ruit?
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Sigged.
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Old 01-17-2007
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zcmrfrodo View Post
wait wait, what is a ruit?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dartmou...Basic_variants
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  #7  
Old 01-17-2007
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Beer Pong.
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RAWR CAPS RAAAR ANGRY ON THE INTERNETS
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  #8  
Old 01-17-2007
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Wow! This guide is so much better than FicWill's, it's scary.
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This comment is entirely the opinion of Mudkip and doesn't reflect a final development decision one way or another. The topic is currently being discussed, and testing will take place in order to decide on the ideal course of action, based on decisions made during that discussion.
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  #9  
Old 01-17-2007
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looks better in game
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Crap, I used ducttape!
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  #10  
Old 01-17-2007
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Except in the middle instead of the ravens it should say

Colts > Ravens 15-6 :O
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