SourceForts - I lol'd, I love this guy

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I lol'd, I love this guy

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/c....column?page=1

Quote:

Now that I've had some time to cool off, I probably should make a formal apology to the people of Mali.

Sorry, my Malian friends.

Yes, it's true, I did loudly demand the annihilation of that nation because of the actions of Malian referee Koman Coulibaly. He almost ruined the U.S. in the World Cup on Friday.

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But an editor reminded me that advocating annihilation of Mali would be irresponsible. He's right. So I settled on severe economic sanctions, to gently send them back to the Stone Age.

Apparently, that won't work either. It turns out Mali is already one of the poorest nations on Earth. All it has are salt mines, some gold deposits, a few herds of skinny goats and not enough shade.

Also, you can't very well demand the slaughter of the national goat herds because of one empty-headed referee.

So please forgive me, people of Mali. I've never met any of you, though I'm sure you're very nice. Still, you probably should make amends, and here's how:

Send us all your gold, and a great pinch of salt to symbolize your eternal fealty, but give us only half your goat herds.

Oh, and deliver us this infamous Koman Coulibaly, alive and in good health but otherwise tightly wrapped in fresh grape leaves, so that we may forgive you. If you don't grow grapes, find some.

Coulibaly, whose name probably means "I hate America and I just ruined the greatest comeback in the history of soccer," was the referee in Friday's crucial World Cup game in South Africa.

An excerpt, lul

Lulz at aggrieved nations thinking that they can play football in the first place.

Also, source discounted for the use of 'soccer.'

What is 'soccer'?

EDIT: I suppose us english lot can't take the piss out of the USA, we suck so much recently. People should watch more rugby

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scatman (Post 274913)

What is 'soccer'?

EDIT: I suppose us english lot can't take the piss out of the USA, we suck so much recently. People should watch more rugby

Soccer is a British word. Americans started using it because we're awesome like that

Don't get me started on why Football (USA) should be called Handegg.

American football is called such because it evolved from a game where you primarily used your feet. The game was a combination of soccer and rugby. In case you haven't noticed by now, American English hasn't changed much throughout history; we still use the old styles of measurement and much of the language from the past has stayed, whereas English in England has changed dramatically.

Jake^: ITS ALUMINUM
scattt: aluminum is an accepted variant
scattt: aluminium is the correct version
scattt: this is the nerdiest conversation ever
Jake^: your face is an accepted variant
Jake^: hrhrhr

pwnt

Aluminium is right. Just because it's spelled the same in german :P